Today was the first day at the new job, and as of this morning I couldn’t decide what to feel.  Nervous?  Excited?  Scared?  Prepared?  I didn’t know.  I only knew the bare minimum of the job description, and had never even been inside the building since I’d been hired based on a phone interview and a recommendation from a friend who already works there.  I woke up early this morning to make sure I had time to shave and eat breakfast and still have a few minutes to sit still before heading off to work for the first time in 8 months.  When I pulled into the parking lot this morning I was ready.  I had every intention of facing the day head on and making it great.

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When I first decided to write this blog entry, I had it all planned out what I was going to say.  I thought of so many different things to talk about and different memories to write about, but now that I’m sitting here ready to write it all out, it escapes me.  I’ve been staring at the screen for a few moments with a blank stare, wondering where all of that went.  I’m a pretty open person most of the time; I’d go so far as to say I actually rarely keep anything to myself.  My mouth runs non-stop at any given time, but that doesn’t mean I don’t keep things to myself.  Everybody has things they keep to themselves and share with only a select few, and this is one of those things.  Something I don’t talk about very often because I just don’t know what to say about any of it.  But for the first time, I’m gonna try.  I’ve never really given it much thought, and when I realized that last night it bothered me.  I need to think about it and remember it all.  This will help.  I hope.

Today would’ve been my little sister’s 12th birthday.

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Anyone who has taken a ride in my car in the past few months, or for that matter even had me as a passenger in their car, has learned that I have a new obsession – playing Prius.  That’s right, the new game of the century is Prius – hitting someone everytime you see a Volkswagen Bug is so 1990′s.  Now you do so when you see a Toyota Prius on the road.  However, there seems to be some confusion as to why this change has occurred, and exactly what the rules are that govern its awesomeness.  Wanna become part of the craze?  Read on.

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The first day of my healthier eating habits is drawing to a close, and I’m quite pleased with myself and how it is turning out.  After a midnight workout, I set an alarm and woke up at 9 a.m. this morning, which pathetically was the earliest I’ve been up in weeks.  I haven’t been sleeping well lately, but maybe the workout last night and the determination to start making a difference in my life helped me to roll out of bed so “early” today.  With groceries in the fridge and pantry, it was time to start making better choices when hunger struck.

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I realized earlier today/yesterday (depending on your frame of reference) that too long have I allowed myself to be unhealthy.  I’ve made excuses for myself and let them allow me to make all the bad decisions I shouldn’t be making.  Since I was laid off I have gained about 20 pounds.  That’s ridiculous.  At first I told myself that I was just laid off and deserved to take some time to relax and eat whatever I want and pretty much just mope around the apartment feeling sorry for myself.  Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months, and here I am over 260 pounds.  I share this embarrassing fact because I’m making some changes, and it’s time to be accountable for them – and this blog will help me do that.

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