It’s Christmas again, and for once I actually feel like I’m in the spirit of things. In the past I’ve barely tolerated the season, becoming a “Scrooge” of sorts, refusing to listen to Christmas music and never understanding the lengths people go to in order to decorate their homes. While I didn’t go out caroling this year, nor did I put up any Christmas decorations, I did feel more cheery than normal. A lot of things in my life have been moving in a positive direction lately, and it’s affecting my outlook on life I think. I seem to be more optimistic, and I smile a lot more. And for those moments when I felt angry and bitter at the world (usually these moments took place while at work), I actually realized it and tried to bring myself back to where I should be. For once in my life, I actually appreciated Christmas for what it really means and enjoyed it.
I wasn’t worried about gifts this year. I didn’t have a lot of money to spend on people, so I made dishes of candy for people. They weren’t anything incredibly fancy, but it’s what I could afford and just about everyone I know loves candy. For a select few people (Keith and direct family) I bought some gifts. And while I was buying those gifts, I realized that I wasn’t really concerned about what I’d be getting in return. Usually I took that into account when buying presents, but this year I just bought what I could afford and what I thought the person would like, then wrapped it up and presented it to them and hoped for the best. It’s taken a long time, but I think I finally realized that Christmas isn’t about gifts. Sure, getting presents is nice and you hope you get something you actually like, but that’s not what it’s about.
I prayed this morning on my way over to my dad’s house to celebrate Christmas. It’s something I don’t do nearly as often as I should, but when I do I try to express myself as best I can. I thanked God for the Son that was sent to us which eventually inspired the Christmas we all know and love. I felt silly at first just talking to my car as I drove down the road, but I got used to it and it felt a little more natural. Maybe I should pray more.
When all was said and done I got some good gifts and some not-so-good gifts. But the thought behind all of them was what made me enjoy getting them. I truly enjoyed this Christmas. I had fun seeing family and spending the day just hanging out and playing games on my brother’s new Nintendo Wii.
I hope that everyone else out there had a wonderful Christmas as well. Now…where’s that rum cake that I got…?
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