A meeting was called yesterday by the Vice President that oversees my work location, and it was then that she announced the entire service center would be shut down, and all employees laid off.  Some people cried.  Some made jokes to break the tension.  I stood there trying to soak it all in.  Everyone knew it was coming, and try as we might to pretend it would be a long time from now, there’s no denying it any longer – we’re all out of a job and it’s time to move on.

There are some good sides and bad sides to every situation, and I’m trying to remain optimistic.  But it’s difficult.  I loved this job when I first started, and used to rave about it and the company to anyone who was caught standing still for a few seconds.  But over the past two years my opinion both of my position and my employer have drastically degraded to the point that I despised not only what I was doing, but myself for not making the effort to change it.  I’m not one to blame others for everything wrong in my life.  I long ago accepted that if I truly wanted a change, I’d step out there and make an effort, but I never did.

Meetings are being held all week to discuss how this affects us and when over the next two month transition period we’ll actually be individually let go.  On the plus side, I’ll be granted a severance package of some sort and extended benefits to be paid for by the company.  On the downside, they aren’t indefinite and I’ll have to hope I can find a suitable replacement job (preferably a step above my current position) quickly.  On the plus side, all the money they’ve contributed towards my school tuition will be forgiven and I won’t have to pay them a dime.  On the downside, my few short years with the company don’t ultimately add to much in the corporate world when considering amount of experience for another position elsewhere.

I have a couple months to look for another job, and will fervently do so.  I haven’t decided whether or not I will actively pursue any other positions within this same company, but my first inclination is to look elsewhere.  I haven’t been happy here and the company as a whole is poorly managed with skewed priorities, at least in my opinion.

I’m going to turn this into something positive.  Being negative complaining about this situation will get me nowhere.  I have faith that something good will come of these bad circumstances.  I can do this.